Wow… is seriously the first word that comes to mind when I think of all the things our family has overcome in the past couple years. From a deployment, to marriage, to having our first child, to finding out my husband had a brain tumor that almost took his life, to getting pregnant with our second child, to finding out our first born is autistic, to finding out my husband is getting medically retired from the Air Force. PHEW! If I could pick a family to receive the “Most Deserving Family Award” (if that even existed), it would be us. It’s been a crazy ride. But something good has got to come out of it, right? I believe so. I’ve always believed that, EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON… and in the midst of all the craziness, we are blessed.
When I say
everything happens for a reason, this is what I mean: In the summer of 2009,
Andrew came back from his first and last deployment in Iraq. A few weeks later,
we got married. We started our new life together in Las Vegas. I was a new RN
graduate, so I decided to attempt the NCLEX (National Council Licensure
Examination)… and I failed. I probably failed FOR A REASON. A month later, I
found out I was pregnant with Jordan J. Around
the time Jordan was supposed to be born in August 2010, Andrew was supposed to
deploy for his 2nd time, but he didn’t… all thanks to his awesome
boss Duane Cruz who did everything in his power to keep him behind JUST so he
wouldn’t miss the birth of his first child. Thank you Cruz! Your decision
ultimately saved his life. Jordan turned 3 months in November and I was lucky
enough to convince Andrew to make a trip home to Florida so our families could
meet our boy. We hop on a plane to go home, a few days later… Andrew suddenly
gets ill. It took THREE Emergency Room trips and his twin brother Anthony to
demand a brain scan before doctors finally found the culprit – a benign
pituitary tumor. It was the size of a golf ball and was on the verge of
rupturing. Andrew was quickly flown to Shands Hospital in Gainesville, Florida
where they removed the tumor piece by piece through his nose! This tumor could
have taken his sight or worse, his life. But it was successfully removed, thank
the Lord! Keep in mind, Andrew was
supposed to be deployed during all this… but he wasn’t, and THIS was the
REASON.
So months pass.
We move to Scott AFB in Illinois. Jordan was about one years old and growing
fast. Life was great; things seemed perfect. So we decided we wanted to try for
another baby soon. We wanted our kids to be close in age about 2 years apart.
My brother Joe and I were only 1 year apart and we were so close. We did
everything together; okay yeah he may have ripped the heads off my barbies
haha, but he was my best friend. And I wanted that for my kids. I found out I
was pregnant when Jordan was about 17 months. When baby #2 would be born,
Jordan would be a little over 2 years old… and that’s exactly what we wanted.
One month later at Jordan’s 18 month well-check, we find out he’s behind on his
development, particularly his speech. He got referrals for speech and
developmental therapy and a referral to meet with a developmental pediatrician.
We didn’t think much of it; we figured he would be a late talker. So he got
speech therapy (ST) and developmental therapy (DT). The Developmental Therapist
recommended he be evaluated by an Occupational Therapist because he showed
signs of SPD or Sensory Processing Disorder. He had issues with certain food
textures or even textures in general. He hated anything sticky or gooey and
never wanted to be messy. He didn’t want to touch play-doh or sand, etc.
Basically, typical things that kids love… he didn’t. Occupational therapy (OT)
knew right away he had SPD so we got that therapy too. Months pass, August
comes around… it’s Jordan’s 2nd birthday! We had an appointment to
see the Developmental Pediatrician we had a referral for months ago soon after
his 2nd birthday. This doctor basically would evaluate Jordan for
any signs of autism. She watched Jordan play and asked us questions. Then we
got the news. I prepared myself mentally for it… Jordan has autism. I was
surprised I handled the diagnoses so well. I’ve come to learn that the
diagnoses was the easy part. It’s what comes after that’s the hardest…
Jordan qualified
for a special therapy geared for children with autism – ABA or Applied
Behavioral Analysis. A therapist came to our home and worked with Jordan
Monday-Friday 3 hours a day! That’s a lot of therapy along with ST, DT &
OT. But Jordan was making great improvements! ABA worked wonders. Don’t get me
wrong, he’s not a talking machine now, but he’s said new words, new signs and
just surprises us with his smart brain. He is SO smart, he even surprised his
therapist. He still has a long way to go of course… but I like to focus on how
far he’s come. Having a child with autism and SPD is not easy. Ever since we
got the diagnoses, he’s learned a lot, but his autistic characteristics are
becoming more apparent. It hurts our hearts to see, but we have to constantly
remind ourselves that he can’t help it and that his brain is wired to think
differently. Please understand that autism is not a disease. It’s a
developmental disorder that affects language, social interaction and
imaginative play. We basically have to help Jordan learn. He can get
overwhelmed easy – that, along with having trouble talking AND sensory issues,
can EASILY put a child with autism into a major meltdown. So next time you are
out and see a young child throwing a tantrum, please don’t judge. Who knows,
that child may be autistic. It’s hard to not ask God, why? Why us? Why Jordan?
But I know that God wouldn’t give us anything we couldn’t handle. God is good
and His intentions are good. Everything happens for a reason right? I may not
know why right now, but maybe I will later J. All we can do for
now, is try our best to help Jordan succeed… and that’s what we’ll do!
Now if that
wasn’t enough already, throw in a newborn baby two months later! Haha! Our
sweet second boy Jaxon entered the world in October 2012. He brings us so much
joy, it’s amazing. But can you believe a couple weeks after he was born, he was
hospitalized for a Staph infection on his skin?! Poor baby was miserable. His
umbilical stump had fallen off early and the skin around it was so red and
flaky; he got blisters in his diaper area near his groin.. it was awful!
Doctors said that was RARE for infants to get, let alone a newborn, and they
couldn’t even give me the cause. But he got the right antibiotics and was good
as new. Matter of fact, he’s a happy, smiling, cooing 2 ½ month old now J. God really does make these little human
beings perfect in their own way. I am so excited to see what God has in store
for Jordan and Jaxon. I pray for nothing but good things for them.
Am I done yet?
By golly, NO. Soon after Jaxon was born, we FINALLY hear the results of
Andrew’s Medical Evaluation Board (MEB). Andrew is getting medically retired.
His brain tumor incident changed Andrew forever. He gets headaches/migraines on
a daily basis, still to this day. His neurologist tried every pain medicine out
there, and nothing helped. Overexertion only makes the pain worse. And because
of the location of the tumor, Andrew has to take a couple hormone replacement
medications every day for the rest of his life. I am happy that he is getting
medically retired because his body just isn’t the same anymore. But I am also a
little sad to say goodbye to the Air Force. I grew up a Navy Brat. So
continuing the military lifestyle as an Air Force spouse only seemed right.
It’s remarkable how many AMAZING people we’ve met along the way in such a short
time. When it comes to the military, it doesn’t take a lifetime to make friends
that you will have forever. These people become your brothers and sisters… they
become family. I am so blessed to have witnessed and experience this kind of
lifestyle and to have lived up to the title of a MILITARY SPOUSE. That term
deserves to be respected and is definitely something to be proud of. There is
NO OTHER job like it. Military spouses are the backbone to this country! They
hold down the fort when their significant other is in harms way. They take care
of the family. They endure months of loneliness and wait patiently and still
hope and pray their loved one makes it back home safely. It is no wonder
military spouses develop a special bond with other military spouses. It’s
pretty amazing and I am going to miss it. BUT, you already know what I’m going
to say right? EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON!!! God has plans for our family…
and it is leading us to the retiree/civilian life J. Thank you USAF and all the wonderful
FAMILY that we’ve met. You all are the reason we are alive and well and will CONTINUE
to be fine for the rest of our lives. We could not be more grateful.
Here’s to a new
year, a new life & new beginnings <3
